Ode to Partiality
Okay, I'm joining the legions of moms who claim their babies are the cutest. I read an article a while back that says that babies are so pleasing to look at because of their round plump faces and proportionally large eyes.
On the subject of eyes... I've been told that I have beautiful eyes with a very exotic shape (asian). Most of my life, I've resisted this compliment b/c I actually don't like to play up my Asian roots. I much prefer big round caucasian shaped eyes! But the grass is always greener on the other side.
But now that I look at my daughter's big almond shaped eyes (thanks to her daddy), I think her part asian features are beautiful. I love the fact that she's of mixed race. She's the posterchild for what I think is God's vision of love. I'm talking about bi-racial children. God is about loving everyone no matter what their culture, color or religion happens to be. And what is larger proof of love than creating life?
I remember being pregnant and dreading how much my body was changing. I was afraid that I'd end up keeping the pregnancy fat, be lined like a zebra, and end up totally unattractive. But surprisingly enough, as my pregnancy progressed and I let my lifelong insecurities go- I felt more and more beautiful. Talk about feeling like a walking temple. lol
Now that I'm a mother, I no longer stress about my looks. And lucky for me (and breastfeeding), I've lost all the baby weight. I admit I have some spider veins and stretch marks. But Jasmin is worth it! If those imperfections give me away that I'm a proud mom-so be it.
Seeing my daughter change day to day, with her own individual beauty, I vow to not stress about the same things we tended to worry about during puberty. I am vain in the respect that I'm proud of my daughter's looks and that's enough for me. I do hope, though, that she is even more than a pretty face- but kind and intelligent.
My looks aren't important anymore.